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Why You Can’t Stop Hunting For (Ever MORE!) Food At Night

February 20th, 2013

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Night-time. Dinner is done, the dishes washed. It’s a little quieter, finally. Time to relax. No sense of urgency, nothing that *has* to be done. At least not until tomorrow. Today has been taken care of.

Except –

You need … something.



But definitely something.

So, you open the fridge.

“Hmmm, what do I feel like?”

Your eyes move quickly. “No, not that. Not that. Maybe. No, don’t really feel like that”

The pantry. “Probably shouldn’t have that. I know! I’ll have something healthy. Some berries. Almond butter. Or yoghurt. A little fruit. Maybe some tea?”

It’s good. It satisfies, for a moment. But it’s not enough, is it. Not quite what you were looking for.

Back you pad to the fridge. Aware of the need to keep this habit, this dinner-to-bedtime grazing, to yourself. Not wanting to have to explain it. Not able to explain it, even to yourself.

You figure that since the healthy snack didn’t quite work you may as well just have the slightly-more-naughty snack.

The piece of chocolate. Sliver of cake. A single cookie or a scoop of ice-cream. Or – if you’re truly being ‘good’ – just a big ole mouthful of nut butter again.

Maybe what you really wanted will be more satisfying? You go back to your book, or computer, or watching TV.

Nup. Didn’t work.

Back to the fridge.

The problem, of course, is that no matter what delights you find in there or store in advance, it’s never – quite – enough. You just want more. You just can’t stop. You – must – keep – eating. Right up until sleep time. Sometimes delaying sleep. Scared of hunger or missing out in some way.


But why?

women and (night-time) snacking: what it really means

This need to eat, to hunt and graze regardless of whether or not you’re actually hungry (and usually you’re not) is much more than the obvious.

Boredom. Procrastination. Tiredness. Stress. Habit. Yes, all part of the picture.

But more than that, here is what you need to understand about you and food –

For women, especially, food can be a salve. It fills a need. It soothes, tells you that everything is going to be okay, that everything is okay. It allows you to push away feelings of anxiety, tension, overwhelm.

Nutritionally, the constant desire to snack can relate to a lack of good solid meals through the day. But this, really, is not about that.

Is it?

This, beautiful lady, is about food replacing the inner satisfaction you really long for.

That fleeting sense of it all being okay, although it lasts barely long enough for you to swallow the last mouthful? It’s as simple as this –

You have a longing. A need. Several, most likely. Daily you go about your busy and productive life, ticking things off.

Work? Check!

Kids? Check!

Partner? Check!

Facebook and email and text messages? Check!

The house, the admin, the keeping up? Check check CHECK!


The real, inner you?


In my coaching work I speak weekly – and sometimes daily – with women who can’t seem to stop this need to eat. It’s easy for me to understand and help, as I was the same for many many years. Sometimes, I still have those nights.

Sometimes, it seems that no matter how much I eat I still don’t feel satisfied. It doesn’t fill me.


But mostly, I’ve learned.

I’ve learned that when I follow my innermost desires and needs on a consistent and daily basis, there is no need to fill myself with food. The satisfaction I experience when I do what I love and love what I do is true satisfaction. Which means it’s enough.

It’s the difference between being able to sit quietly at night – or anytime – and just be. Be fulfilled, be at peace, be happy with who I am and what lies ahead.

Of course there are things I do each day that I’d probably rather avoid. I’m never going to love doing admin, checking figures, or even editing my own work once it’s written.

But the stuff that I have to do? It is easy and also not important so long as I’ve done the stuff that I actually have to do, for me.

And for me that comes back to this –

I know what I need, deep down, to be fulfilled. I’m not talking about what I need materially or even practically. I’m talking about the feelings and emotions I need to experience to be happy, free, at peace. To feel that my life is in alignment and just –


you deserve to live a life that you love

You deserve to live the life you were born to live, beautiful.

I don’t know what that life may be, and perhaps you don’t know either. So here’s where to start.

Consider –

What do you really need to feel in order to be happy and satisfied?

What re the emotions you want to experience to know that this – this – is what life is all about?

What do you desire above all else?

Go for a walk. Or pull out your journal. Do it today.

And write or think about what you truly long for. No, I’m not talking about a lean body, a better house, a 6-figure business.

I’m talking about things like peace. Confidence. Certainty. Joy. Calm. Whatever it is that you need right now.

And then find a way to experience the top few of those wants, daily.

Perhaps you will need to sacrifice your early mornings. Your lunch break. Change the way or time you workout in order to make more space for you. Perhaps you need to be alone. Or with others.

Only you can find out.

But you’ll never know, unless you do make that space.

You will, in fact, never find your dream life unless you make space for it.

And as you do, many many miracles will occur.

The greatest of all, perhaps, being that you’ll finally be able to walk past that fridge door without a second glance 🙂

The great thing about that, of course, being nothing to do with food and everything to do with knowing that this – this – is what life is all about.

You deserve to live a life you love beautiful.

Get out there and claim it.

After all –

Life is Now. Press Play.

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