We all have one.
It’s usually sneaky.
A little underhand.
We might laugh it off or make light of it to others if they notice; pretend it’s not such a big deal and we can stop anytime.
Believing in our own minds that that’s true but also at the same time feeling scared –
What if it’s not?
What if I can never stop?
What if I keep sabotaging all my good effort day after day with this one stupid thing?
What if I NEVER get results because of it?
I think it’s time to air this sh*t out. In an ‘I’ll tell you mine if you tell me yours sort of way’.
So here goes –
My very worst food habit is that since I was roughly 28 weeks pregnant (my son is now 10.5 weeks) I have been obsessed with caramel slices. Can’t get enough of them! In the hospital I was having one DAILY (I was admitted for week+ stays several times during pregnancy). It was kind of my deliberate comfort to deal with the super scary pregnancy. And the hospital cafe had GOOD ones 🙂
There was also (and this might be weird but if you’re an emotional eater you’ll get it) a sense of pride that I was ‘able’ to eat this one ‘naughty indulgence’ each day and stop there. No binging. And also no shame or guilt. I felt totally okay with it as my one exception when I was eating so well despite living in hospital, plus there was definitely a sense of ‘I’ll take advantage while I’m pregnant’
But now, I’m pretty ready to let go of that habit. I’m not doing it every day anymore, but I’ll admit to having on more than one occasion post-birth gone (way) out of my way to go and purchase a good GF caramel slice. And I was pretty much caving anytime I accidentally came across one in a cafe 🙂
Yesterday, however, I had a breakthrough! I sat in a cafe mid-afternoon and did NOT buy the yummy looking mini GF caramel slice sitting there.
But it got me to thinking afterwards –
Why was that so hard? What is it really about?
The question was oddly tough to answer. Is it just a bad habit? I just like sweet stuff, especially when I’m working mid-afternoon; is that what it is? It’s kind of my ‘me’ time with my writing and coffee and treat; is that it?
Yes, and yes, and yes.
But why not have a healthier or at least less calorie and crap-rich treat? (Note: I don’t ‘do’ calorie counting but I still take it into consideration. And those babies outweigh several meals. Not ideal as a daily habit)
So anyway, I was walking along the beach this morning on the way to my fave morning writing cafe and it hit me –
There’s a part of me that’s thinking “what if I don’t get back into shape this time around post-pregnancy”.
Yeah, it’s only been 10 weeks. But still – of course I’m thinking about it already! And I am a little scared, what if I really do ‘everything’ to eat and train really well and I don’t get the lean and toned body I worked so hard for back?
I know, I know – it wouldn’t be the end of the world, what really matters is my beautiful kids, and so on. I know 🙂
But that’s not the point of this story and besides which I believe you can have it all as a Mum and frankly I refuse NOT to have it all!
However, the underlying fear and ‘what if’ is enough, I realised, for me to sabotage my success with this sneaky food habit. Even though I’m really nourishing my body with my meals, I’m doing the right sort of exercise for me for right now, I’m allowing myself to keep going with a habit that is NOT serving me (I don’t even really enjoy eating them anymore as I feel a bit stodgy afterwards) because my doing so I can keep telling myself that if I ‘really’ wanted to shape up all I’d need to do is drop the slice.
But what if I did?
And what if I still didn’t drop the extra weight?
How about you? When you think about why you keep doing that ‘worst food habit’, the one that actually makes you feel like crap physically and emotionally, what is it really about?
And what would be the worst case scenario if you STOPPED that habit?
Answer that last question and you probably have the real answer to why you’re doing it.
Once you get clear on WHY you’re doing something you’d prefer to be able to let go of it’s very easy to actually let go. The best way to do that is NOT to try and discipline yourself out of it, but instead to ‘replace’ the bad habit.
It’s easy to do and you don’t feel as though you’re missing out.
So this afternoon I’ll be sitting down to my mid-arvo coffee and I WILL be having a sweet treat. I’m thinking I’ll bring a row of super-dark organic chocolate with me. Yum! And it’s very motivating to already know that I’m going to end today feeling really proud of myself for making choices that make me feel good.
Weight and body fat stuff aside, that should be your ultimate goal with your food.
What habit would you need to do today, or let go of today, or replace today, to make you feel really freaking good about yourself?
And remember –
Life is Now. Press Play.