At the start of 2013, my goal was to be healthy and lean year round. At the start of 2012, I said I wanted to get abs. At the start of 2011 – or perhaps the end of 2010 – I had abs and was super lean. My resolution was to stay that way; to maintain the ‘near perfect’ body I’d managed to somehow grasp hold of at the time. At the start of 2010 I had just given birth. My NY goal was to get my pre-baby body back. To get abs 🙂 If I go back further? Which I could, as I have all my journals dating back my entire life. Well, I probably don’t have to tell you – Having a lean and flat tummy, an enviable body always featured. The sad part is that it featured even when in retrospect I can see that I was pretty much as lean as lean can be; yet just not aware of it at the time. Sure, I do have other goals each year. I’m not all about how I look 😉 I have a myriad of goals in fact! I’m a goal-setting kind of gal; I love it.
I credit much of my success in my business and
life to the fact that I set goals. I dream. I vision.
And I fill a heck of a lot of journals 🙂
But there’s some goals, that for some reason, just never quite come true in the way that I wish them to. They’re the kind of goals that even if I do achieve them – like at the start of 2011 and even more recently for my photoshoot last year seem to be fleeting. Slippery. I can’t hold onto them. It’s not that I don’t want to. Why wouldn’t I want a ‘perfect body’ all year around? So no, a lack of desire isn’t the reason. What it is, is a lack of alignment.
When I start defining success or happiness or
accomplishment by rigid and tight standards, suddenly, all of
these things elude me. They slip through my fingers. And
eventually I must ask – is that what really mattered?
Have you noticed that in your own life? Have you noticed that when you push and push and push yourself to have to look a certain way, be a certain way, live up to a certain standard (in any area), that it’s incredibly tough to achieve that goal? And tougher still to maintain it? I know you have. And I know that – just like me – it’s not that you can’t achieve that goal. For me – I know how to get lean. I’ve done it so many times over. And yes, I certainly am lean anyway; I know that. But what I’m talking about here is going from in shape to ‘freaking amazing’. You know what I mean 🙂 And that last part – it constantly slips away from me. Or at least, it always used to slip away from me. Now, perhaps, it’s too soon to say. But I feel as though things are different in this area; I feel as though I’ve ‘figured out my missing link’ to do with creating but also maintaining my best body. I’m quite sure it IS the bit that was missing as it’s the thing that already existed for each of my other goals. The ones – no matter how big or scary – I seem to almost effortlessly achieve, and then hold onto. It’s very simple really – It’s knowing my ‘why’. And it’s having a why that is about something that actually truly matters to me. Does having abs matter to me? Yes in some ways, but in the ways that really count – not so much. It’s not something that I need on a soul level, if you know what I mean. It won’t fulfill me or help me to share my gifts. It doesn’t heal me like writing does, it doesn’t fill me with joy like playing with my two children does.It’s surface stuff. Not saying there’s anything wrong with wanting to look good. I’m all for a bit of vanity! But there has to be a reason. A higher purpose.
What’s Your Higher Purpose for Your 2014 Body Goal?
When you think about what’s important to you in 2014, I think you’d be lying if you say there is nothing physically that you’d like to achieve. Your body goals or ideals may not be as straight out ‘vanity based’ as mine have been, but I’d say they’re there, in one form or another. And from what I can tell in talking with your fellow Woman Incredible readers, the vanity goals are always there. It’s just that sometimes they’re sort of ignored, or downgraded. Because you think that it’s not right to care that much or because – Because you’ve given up on ever quite getting there. But here’s what you have to do if you want to ever get ‘there’. You have to let go of fighting so hard to change your body by ONLY focusing on what you should/should not eat and how you should/should not train. You have to start tuning in to the deeper stuff. Because this is the stuff that will change you. I’m talking about peeling away all the obvious layers of why you should want to change your body (like wanting to look hot or wear sexy clothes or even do a sexy photoshoot) and getting to the stuff that you probably haven’t even considered. For me, when I got right down deep, achieving my best body was about pride. The pride of knowing that I’d truly given my training my all in a way that I hadn’t been doing for some time. I’d been giving it maybe 80 or 90%. Not my all. And it mattered. To me. The pride of knowing that instead of letting meals occasionally be pushed back because I was too busy, or of eating snacky meals rather than real food, I was nourishing my body regularly with gorgeous food that I’d mostly prepared myself. The pride of setting myself a goal that was scary and yet exciting, and then stepping up to achieve it. My word is pride. What’s your word? When you find your word, you find a big part of your why. It’s a start. It helps you to understand why you actually care about this stuff. And you know what? It’s okay to care. It’s okay to want to look hot. But you will never ever ever quite get there if you don’t know why it actually matters to you. In The Look Great Naked Academy one of the key Mindset & Motivation journalling works we do is on finding your why. It’s one of the most popular parts of the mindset side of this bootcamp. It’s one after the doing of which the bootcamp beauties often comment on our forum about how they’re so glad they did this bootcamp. How they didn’t realise it was going to impact on so many areas of their lives and thought processes. How fantastic it is that I’ve created something like this, something that goes so far beyond how to eat and how to train. I’m incredibly proud of my bootcamp beauties. When I asked for a summary of how they found the bootcamp overall, I got a lot of sh*t-hot before and after photos. Transformations physically, that for a 6 week period, are nothing short of remarkable. But what topped it off for me – and what I believe is the main reason so many of these ladies are not prepared to leave the bootcamp – is the changes that happened internally. The shifts on self-love. On the mindset of getting the body you want. On finally figuring your ‘stuff’ out, finally feeling as though you canbe that girl. And knowing how to be.
Finding Your Why
Your why for your 2014 body goal is already waiting for you to find. It’s been there all along. And now, as we step boldly into a new year, I encourage you to approach changing your body this year in a different and new way. Don’t make it another (yet another!) year in which you say “This is the year I change my body. Get abs. Finally get lean. Feel great about myself. Wear short skirts or shorts.”Or whatever. Make it a year in which you set a goal about finding yourself. About finding out why you actually care. About being open to the fact that possibly – quite possibly – what you thought you cared about so much doesn’t actually matter that much at all. Or is simply a little different to what you first though. Imagine what it would be like to be able to chase a body goal that you KNOW you want passionately and that you KNOW you are committed to making happen purely because for the first time ever you’ve found a deep motivation that will actually DRIVE you to do what it takes. Can you imagine? Will you give it a go? A simple way to find your way is to repeatedly journal the questions –
“Why is this important to me”
“How do I mean”
In the academy we do go deeper. And we have Mindset & Motivation work to help you layer this process. But if you start with just the above two questions, and you just keep going and going and going, whether in your journal or perhaps on a walk, I promise you – You’ll hit a lightbulb moment.
You Will Feel It.
And – perhaps for the first time ever – you’ll know deep in your heart of hearts that this time is different. That this time you won’t be turning back or off track. That this time you are genuinely motivated from within and not only that but you’re so damn excited about actually having a goal that meets your deepest values as well as the surface desire to wanna look hot. My body goal for 2014? It’s no longer about abs. It’s all about pride. What’s yours?
After all –
Life is Now. Press Play.
P.S. Want to know one of my little secrets to being in amazing shape all year round??? You need to have a high protein diet in order to lose FAT not muscle! And one of the easiest ways you can do those is to have a Woman Incredible Protein shake! My protein powder is 100% natural, comes in a variety of flavours and tastes incredible. I love blending my with a handful of ice…it goes so smooth and creamy! Yum 🙂